Holiday Stress and Depression

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Hello Friends,
Whether we are ready or not, the holidays are upon us once again. When you think holidays, most people think: food, family and fun…but for many, the holidays mark a very lonely and depressing time. This stress and depression is often the results of trauma and/or emotional memories from past holidays. People who have abandonment issues can also have those feelings accentuated during the holidays which reminds them how alone they ‘are’. Many will turn down invitations and celebrations in order to find the misery that they are so comfortable with and some may even feel intense guilt if they were to go out and actually enjoy the holidays.

Not only are ghosts from the past causes for holiday discomfort but many things can contribute to holiday stress and depression: Finances, family (or lack thereof), physical demands, time pressure. If these things are managed properly, the holidays can very well be a very enjoyable time. Some tips on how to reduce your holiday stress:

• Think Positive: Flip that switch, lock away that negative voice, concentrate on the good and treat yourself with gentleness and kindness. Just by changing your attitude and how you look at people and situations can change the way you feel by leaps and bounds. Many don’t realize that thinking positive is a CHOICE…so choose to be positive!
• Manage Your Time: Sit down and figure out a schedule for shopping, cooking, working and celebrating. If you set aside specific days to shop, bake, etc. you will have less last minute time stress to sneak up and bite you in the butt. If family stresses you out, figure out how much time you can spend with them before you ‘wig out’ and then know your limits. You can spend just the right amount of time with family to make it an enjoyable experience.
• Look at Your Finances: Be realistic and set a budget for your holiday shopping and celebrations…and stick to it. Remember, home-made gifts go a long way in the sentimental department and people appreciate the work put into them.
• Enjoy YOUR Time: Things tend to get hectic around the holiday season, between shopping frenzies and celebrations. Take some quiet time for you: Languish in a warm bath, Enjoy the crackling of a fire, Walk through the trees or alongside the ocean, work on a project or craft…find out what makes your heart sing…and do it.
• Feel: Allow yourself to feel your emotions. Acknowledge how you feel, then let it go. I find most people tend to bottle up their emotions which can lead to serious illness. Learn to feel!
• Step Out Of the Box: If you are normally alone during the holidays, allow yourself to be surrounded by others. Reach out and participate in community events. Volunteering can also make you feel great as well as introduce you to new people. Accept invitations for dinners and celebrations or go to a public spot and allow yourself to enjoy people. It is ok…You are worth it.
• Listen to That Inner Voice: Listen to your intuition and trust in it. Every time an opportunity arises, pay attention to that feeling in your chest or gut. Do you have excited butterflies or is it tied in stressful knots? Does it flutter ‘yes’ or give you a sickening ‘no’? Learn how to decipher the two and pay extra attention on how to pick out the false negatives. Years of training can give you a false ‘no’ signal, when someone invites you to celebrate, when what you really want to say is ‘yes’. Let yourself say ‘YES’ for a change and allow yourself to enjoy.
• Be Honest: Be honest to those around you and especially to yourself. Telling stories to make you look good or ‘well rounded’ never works. People can usually see right through the lies and you end up feeling awful for being deceptive. When you tell lies, you also bring on extra stress for yourself in order to keep your tales straight. Being truthful goes a long way in helping to reduce stress as well as being more comfortable in your own skin.
• Find Help: If you have trouble helping yourself get past the issues that are causing your holiday stress and depression, find a professional to help you. There are many wonderful modalities to help you get past ‘the past’. Hypnotherapy can help by pinpointing the exact circumstance that caused the behavior which, in turn, can be approached and then replaced with positive suggestions.

It is time to stop the Holiday Blues, from feeling down in the dumps and to let go of that stress and depression. This year, take control so you can enjoy the holidays. You deserve it!
Warmly,
Bettina Clifton, ccht
www.marinhypnotherapy.com